Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Master Debaters, Denouement

When you shoot your mouth from the hip
like a cowboy wearing wing-tips
you perhaps should have thought
foreign policy's not
just like a game of Battleship.

Last night was the third and, thankfully, final presidential debate. Mitt Romney looked less like a serious candidate and more like a beauty pageant contestant who couldn't think of a suitable answer to the final question.

There were a couple of really great points made by the president, as he slapped Romney around like a petulant kindergartner who pretends to know everything.

MR. ROMNEY: Our Navy is older — excuse me — our Navy is smaller now than any time since 1917.

PRESIDENT OBAMA: I think Governor Romney maybe hasn't spent enough time looking at how our military works. You — you mentioned the Navy, for example, and that we have fewer ships than we did in 1916. Well, Governor, we also have fewer horses and bayonets because the nature of our military's changed. We have these things called aircraft carriers where planes land on them. We have these ships that go underwater, nuclear submarines.

And so the question is not a game of Battleship where we're counting ships. It's — it's what are our capabilities. 

While that was the big "Oh, Snap" moment in the debate, the biggest WTF moment was, hands down, Romney's comments on Iran and Syria.

MR. ROMNEY: Syria is Iran's only ally in the Arab world. It's their route to the sea.

Any Fourth Grade geography student can look at a globe and point out the idiocy of that statement. Iran is separated by Iraq and Turkey. Iran also has more than 1,500 miles of coastline, connecting to the Persian Gulf and Gulf of Oman, as well as Caspian Sea.

I wish I could take credit for the "cowboy wearing wingtips" line, but I stole it from one of Obama's advisers.

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