Want to blaspheme? It's your right!
Because, in this world, God's a blight.
If you'd be inclined
to open your mind
the fires of freedom you'll ignite.
Today is International Blasphemy Rights Day. One thing that Americans take for granted, for the most part, is the freedom of speech.. People in other parts of the world are not as lucky. Some people take their religion seriously, and I understand that. But killing someone because they said or drew something that parodies or satirizes your religion is wrong.
Friday, September 30, 2011
Thursday, September 29, 2011
It's Your Money, Pay For It Now
Use B of A? You're outta luck.
It's your cash? They don't give a fuck.
They find it funny:
To get your money
you have to give them five bucks.
Bank of America has decided to charge people to access their own money. That's right. If you want to spend the money that you have earned, you have to pay BoA for that right. $5 every month. Fuck you, BoA.
It's your cash? They don't give a fuck.
They find it funny:
To get your money
you have to give them five bucks.
Bank of America has decided to charge people to access their own money. That's right. If you want to spend the money that you have earned, you have to pay BoA for that right. $5 every month. Fuck you, BoA.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Dick Retracts Controversial Statement. News At 11.
Dick Perry said he misspoke
or maybe he suffered a srtoke
He acts so monstrous
and calls others heartless.
His campaign is such a joke.
Dick Perry, that slimy, pandering piece of scum has said that his remarks calling his opponents 'heartless' were inappropriate.
Who'd have thunk that he would try to retract a comment that turned off some of the Republican base?
or maybe he suffered a srtoke
He acts so monstrous
and calls others heartless.
His campaign is such a joke.
Dick Perry, that slimy, pandering piece of scum has said that his remarks calling his opponents 'heartless' were inappropriate.
Who'd have thunk that he would try to retract a comment that turned off some of the Republican base?
On The Proximity Of An Elected Official
To find the source of their fear
and why their heads aren't so clear
Just look in their eyes.
you'll find no surprise:
It's because the president's near.
Yup. Blazing Saddles jokes. I have no shame.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Tuesday Never! Thursday Forever!
Hang him from the highest tree!
Poke out his eyes! Kick his knees!
It takes balls to say
you worship Tuesday
when Thursday's the truest belief!
My nemesis, Cuttlefish, has declared himself to be a Tuesdayist. This calls for a crusade! I implore all two of my loyal readers to stand with me against the darkness. He may have numbers, but with right on our side, we will be heralded with glorious limericks that shall last through the ages!
Poke out his eyes! Kick his knees!
It takes balls to say
you worship Tuesday
when Thursday's the truest belief!
My nemesis, Cuttlefish, has declared himself to be a Tuesdayist. This calls for a crusade! I implore all two of my loyal readers to stand with me against the darkness. He may have numbers, but with right on our side, we will be heralded with glorious limericks that shall last through the ages!
Monday, September 26, 2011
How Can You Make Ends Meet When You Can't See Them?
You feel like you have little power
as you look up at their gilded tower.
You let slip a sigh
and try to get by:
Surviving on nine bucks an hour.
You try hard to make both ends meet.
You can't? Then you're out on the street.
So force on a grin
and go out again
and don't let the world know you're beat.
Minimum wage has been getting a lot of press recently, because of Dick Perry's claims that he created sooo many jobs in Texas, without regard to the pay. We've had to make some of these same choices, even recently, and it really sucks to have to choose between a week's meals or a doctor's appointment. Both parents working doesn't get much better, because the cost of childcare quickly eats up any additional income.
Life is difficult, and we don't need politicians making it harder for those of us with little means.
Now you can play a little game, and see what it's like.
Hat tip
as you look up at their gilded tower.
You let slip a sigh
and try to get by:
Surviving on nine bucks an hour.
You try hard to make both ends meet.
You can't? Then you're out on the street.
So force on a grin
and go out again
and don't let the world know you're beat.
Minimum wage has been getting a lot of press recently, because of Dick Perry's claims that he created sooo many jobs in Texas, without regard to the pay. We've had to make some of these same choices, even recently, and it really sucks to have to choose between a week's meals or a doctor's appointment. Both parents working doesn't get much better, because the cost of childcare quickly eats up any additional income.
Life is difficult, and we don't need politicians making it harder for those of us with little means.
Now you can play a little game, and see what it's like.
Hat tip
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Suffering For Suffrage
They're getting some freedom in stages.
Now voting. Next driving and wages?
But Muslim women
are worth half of men.
Their faith keeps them in the Dark Ages.
In an interesting development, the King of Saudi Arabia has decreed that women will have the right to vote in municipal elections. They would also have the right to serve on the Shura Council, which provides consultation to the leadership.
This is a big step that I hope will lead towards gender equality. I doubt it though, because Islam is notoriously misogynistic, and all religions are used to control others.
Now voting. Next driving and wages?
But Muslim women
are worth half of men.
Their faith keeps them in the Dark Ages.
In an interesting development, the King of Saudi Arabia has decreed that women will have the right to vote in municipal elections. They would also have the right to serve on the Shura Council, which provides consultation to the leadership.
This is a big step that I hope will lead towards gender equality. I doubt it though, because Islam is notoriously misogynistic, and all religions are used to control others.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Who's Side is God Really On?
They hold their skills in low esteem.
To me, that is how it seems.
If you kneel and pray,
things don't go your way,
does that mean God don't like your team?
Constantly confusing to me is the act of praying before, during and after a sporting event. Both sides pray to, ostensibly, the same deity. How does God decide who is going to win? Does the team that prays harder get to win? What about the team that has more people praying for them?
To me, that is how it seems.
If you kneel and pray,
things don't go your way,
does that mean God don't like your team?
Constantly confusing to me is the act of praying before, during and after a sporting event. Both sides pray to, ostensibly, the same deity. How does God decide who is going to win? Does the team that prays harder get to win? What about the team that has more people praying for them?
A Reason To Get Out Of Bed In The Morning
I always yearn for you aw'fly
I'm glad I can get you law'fly
You make every day
great in its own way.
Thanks for being special, coffee
Inspiration
I'm glad I can get you law'fly
You make every day
great in its own way.
Thanks for being special, coffee
Inspiration
Friday, September 23, 2011
Reformation Through Evil
They say they want people to change.
The method they're using is strange.
If they took a look
at what's in that book
they'd see that they're really deranged
Yes, the bible is an evil book. It tells of a petty, vindictive, nasty, childish deity who would kill humanity as soon as look at it.
Now a judge in Alabama wants to use that book as a punishment, giving people who are charged with misdemeanors the choice between serving jail time and going to church every Sunday for a year. Mike Rowland, chief of police in Bay Minette, Alabama says it's all legal, because people will get a 'choice'.
The method they're using is strange.
If they took a look
at what's in that book
they'd see that they're really deranged
Yes, the bible is an evil book. It tells of a petty, vindictive, nasty, childish deity who would kill humanity as soon as look at it.
Now a judge in Alabama wants to use that book as a punishment, giving people who are charged with misdemeanors the choice between serving jail time and going to church every Sunday for a year. Mike Rowland, chief of police in Bay Minette, Alabama says it's all legal, because people will get a 'choice'.
We're Supposed To Be The Civilized Ones
This story can't be dismissed:
We're slipping into the abyss.
This proves that vengeance
determines the sentence
It's never been about justice.
If anyone tells you that the death penalty is not about revenge, they are lying to you. Lying through their teeth. I know that some people support the state-sanctioned murder of inmates. Hell, there was a time in my life that I would have agreed with them. But by denying them their last meals, on the grounds that "their victims didn't get to choose their last meals", removes any last bit of civility they might have claimed.
We're supposed to be better than this.
We're slipping into the abyss.
This proves that vengeance
determines the sentence
It's never been about justice.
If anyone tells you that the death penalty is not about revenge, they are lying to you. Lying through their teeth. I know that some people support the state-sanctioned murder of inmates. Hell, there was a time in my life that I would have agreed with them. But by denying them their last meals, on the grounds that "their victims didn't get to choose their last meals", removes any last bit of civility they might have claimed.
We're supposed to be better than this.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Madness. Utter Madness.
The crazy's at critical mass.
Does this prove we lost all our class?
We're now at the brink.
It'll drive you to drink,
Ted Haggard, with a different ass.
Ted Haggard, notorious meth-head and serial buggerrer, is going to appear on Wife Swap with coke-head Gary Busey.
Does this prove we lost all our class?
We're now at the brink.
It'll drive you to drink,
Ted Haggard, with a different ass.
Ted Haggard, notorious meth-head and serial buggerrer, is going to appear on Wife Swap with coke-head Gary Busey.
Santorum. It's What's For Dinner.
He breaks the bounds of decorum.
He's failed in the public forum.
He's a spineless skink.
Must be hard to think
with a head full of santorum.
Santorum. Now Santorum (the presidential candidate) wants Google to change their search results.
He's failed in the public forum.
He's a spineless skink.
Must be hard to think
with a head full of santorum.
Santorum. Now Santorum (the presidential candidate) wants Google to change their search results.
Knives Grow On Trees, Right?
She's toying with obscurity
and still screeching like a banshee.
She had a good run,
her campaign's 'bout done
she's not the sharpest knife on the tree.
Poor Michelle Bachmann. Her inanity will come to an end soon, I believe. She's been a source of much humor, but her idiocy will cause even the most anti-intellectual voters in the GOP to shy away from her.
and still screeching like a banshee.
She had a good run,
her campaign's 'bout done
she's not the sharpest knife on the tree.
Poor Michelle Bachmann. Her inanity will come to an end soon, I believe. She's been a source of much humor, but her idiocy will cause even the most anti-intellectual voters in the GOP to shy away from her.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Why Does Dick Hate Chicks?
"Love Thy Neighbor" says the Christian
It's not a rule they keep hidden.
But the evidence
is his arrogance:
It's clear that Dick Perry hates women.
If he doesn't hate women, he holds them in the deepest disdain. Why else would he cut health care for women?
And please don't take "chicks" in the headline as an insult. I mean nothing ill by it.
It's not a rule they keep hidden.
But the evidence
is his arrogance:
It's clear that Dick Perry hates women.
If he doesn't hate women, he holds them in the deepest disdain. Why else would he cut health care for women?
And please don't take "chicks" in the headline as an insult. I mean nothing ill by it.
They Were Asked, They Told "I Do"
A story that I think is swell.
A couple just heard wedding bells!
Don't need God above
to approve of their love.
The death of Don't Ask Don't Tell.
Just after midnight, a Navy Lt. married his love. It was the first time he was allowed to express himself as he truly was, a homosexual service-member. Countless lives and careers have been destroyed by that short-sighted law. Good riddance.
Next step: Get the Federal Government to recognize their marriage, so his husband can get the benefits of being married to an officer.
A couple just heard wedding bells!
Don't need God above
to approve of their love.
The death of Don't Ask Don't Tell.
Just after midnight, a Navy Lt. married his love. It was the first time he was allowed to express himself as he truly was, a homosexual service-member. Countless lives and careers have been destroyed by that short-sighted law. Good riddance.
Next step: Get the Federal Government to recognize their marriage, so his husband can get the benefits of being married to an officer.
Monday, September 19, 2011
He Knows The Birds In The Fields?
They say a new specie was found
and the meaning of it is profound.
Darwin's theory still weighs
so strong to this day.
Evolution, you see, still abounds.
Scientists have discovered genetic evidence that a new species of sparrow has evolved recently. This really does put the lie to creationism, or the "Intelligent Design" idiocy. Of course, the next lie from that camp will be to say that god or whatever intelligence is in charge put it there, but having genetic evidence kinda nips that in the bud.
and the meaning of it is profound.
Darwin's theory still weighs
so strong to this day.
Evolution, you see, still abounds.
Scientists have discovered genetic evidence that a new species of sparrow has evolved recently. This really does put the lie to creationism, or the "Intelligent Design" idiocy. Of course, the next lie from that camp will be to say that god or whatever intelligence is in charge put it there, but having genetic evidence kinda nips that in the bud.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Dammit, Vikings!
It seems the defense has a thing
to not stop what offenses bring.
The defense? Run through.
They're now oh-and-two
Dammit! Stop losing, Vikings!
Before this NFL season started, I predicted the Minnesota Vikings would go 9-7, and sneak into the wild card. I was derided for this prediction, because everyone is certain that the NFC wild card will come from the NFC East. The East will beat the hell out of each other, allowing another team to steal the last playoff spot. I still think it will be the Vikes, but it'll be tougher.
to not stop what offenses bring.
The defense? Run through.
They're now oh-and-two
Dammit! Stop losing, Vikings!
Before this NFL season started, I predicted the Minnesota Vikings would go 9-7, and sneak into the wild card. I was derided for this prediction, because everyone is certain that the NFC wild card will come from the NFC East. The East will beat the hell out of each other, allowing another team to steal the last playoff spot. I still think it will be the Vikes, but it'll be tougher.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
On The Occasion Of My Wife's Birth
Your eyes are like the finest art.
I hope that we never will part.
I just want to say:
Happiest Birthday!
I love you with all of my heart.
I hope that we never will part.
I just want to say:
Happiest Birthday!
I love you with all of my heart.
Science, Judged.
Can't see the future? You're liable.
This court's missed the point by a mile.
The law gets abused
and then we all lose
Whenever there's science on trial
Scientists in Italy are going on trial for manslaughter, because they didn't predict an earthquake in 2009. A lawyer for one of the scientists is worried that, because the trial will be held in the city most affected, there is a chance that his client might be convicted. Although scientists worldwide have signed statements that support the Italians, people seem to think that science is ruled by laws that don't actually exist.
This court's missed the point by a mile.
The law gets abused
and then we all lose
Whenever there's science on trial
Scientists in Italy are going on trial for manslaughter, because they didn't predict an earthquake in 2009. A lawyer for one of the scientists is worried that, because the trial will be held in the city most affected, there is a chance that his client might be convicted. Although scientists worldwide have signed statements that support the Italians, people seem to think that science is ruled by laws that don't actually exist.
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