If you do not know who Tim Tebow is, get out from under your rock and turn on ESPN. He is the Heisman winning QB from Florida, who, if he wins the SEC championship game, will play in yet another national championship game. Huzzah for him.
Why do I fucking hate Tim Tebow?
He was recently on a missionary trip to the Philippines. That trip is bad enough in and of itself. People went for medical and dental care, yet had to sit through a religious spiel before getting treated. I consider that cruel and unusual punishment, but those people need the treatment, so any is good. But that wasn't enough for Mr. Tebow.
Deciding that he wanted to get more "hands on", he assisted doctors with circumcisions.
Think about that.
Tim Tebow, majoring in "family, youth and community sciences" (Whatever the hell that is. Science? Really?) took up a needle and thread (okay, sutures are subtly different) and sewed up freshly mutilated penises. I know that medical standards in the Philippines are more lax than here, but really?
The important point to me is the genital mutilation. If anyone tries to tell you that circumcision (male genital mutilation) is for any reason other than religious, you can feel free to safely ignore anything else they have to say.
If anyone tells you that circumcision (male genital mutilation) is different or better than the slicing off of the labia or clitoris of little girls, feel free to punch them in their throat, because it is the same thing. It is mutilating the genitals of a young child, an innocent who knows nothing but the pain.
Fuck you, Tim Tebow. I fucking hate you.
References
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
I'll just leave this here...
Well a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share
He fumbled round until he could no longer keep his feet
Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
About that time two young and lovely girls just happend by
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
See young sleeping Scotsman so strong and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold, for them to view, beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
They marveled for a moment, then one said we must be gone
Let's leave a present for our friend, before we move along
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon, tied into a bow
Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled towards a tree
Behind a bush, he lift his kilt and gawks at what he sees
And in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes.
O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize
And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share
He fumbled round until he could no longer keep his feet
Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
About that time two young and lovely girls just happend by
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
See young sleeping Scotsman so strong and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold, for them to view, beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
They marveled for a moment, then one said we must be gone
Let's leave a present for our friend, before we move along
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon, tied into a bow
Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled towards a tree
Behind a bush, he lift his kilt and gawks at what he sees
And in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes.
O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Don't fuck with P&T
Posted here.
Donohue can't learn to say when.
His head's up his ass yet again!
He thinks they're a prize,
but he picked the wrong guys -
Teller and his partner Penn
Old Bill's gonna learn the hard way
his religion's becoming passe.
But he'll still be a pawn
when he finds his god gone.
He'll be on his knees everyday
Donohue can't learn to say when.
His head's up his ass yet again!
He thinks they're a prize,
but he picked the wrong guys -
Teller and his partner Penn
Old Bill's gonna learn the hard way
his religion's becoming passe.
But he'll still be a pawn
when he finds his god gone.
He'll be on his knees everyday
Yeah, I'm on Twitter...
I'm following #obamacare
They can't tell here from there
they think that it's wise
to spread all their lies
and pull "facts" out of thin air
They can't tell here from there
they think that it's wise
to spread all their lies
and pull "facts" out of thin air
Friday, August 14, 2009
Best pro-government health care post. EVAR.
From Ozone on Fark:
This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the U.S. Department of Energy.
I then took a shower in the clean water provided by a municipal water utility.
After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC-regulated channels to see what the National Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determined the weather was going to be like, using satellites designed, built, and launched by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration.
I watched this while eating my breakfast of U.S. Department of Agriculture-inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration.
At the appropriate time, as regulated by the U.S. Congress and kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology and the U.S. Naval Observatory, I get into my National Highway Traffic Safety Administration-approved automobile and set out to work on the roads build by the local, state, and federal Departments of Transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the Environmental Protection Agency, using legal tender issued by the Federal Reserve Bank.
On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the U.S. Postal Service and drop the kids off at the public school.
After spending another day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the Department of Labor and the Occupational Safety and Health administration, enjoying another two meals which again do not kill me because of the USDA, I drive my NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to my house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and Fire Marshal's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the local police department.
And then I log on to the internet -- which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration -- and post on Freerepublic.com and Fox News forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right.
This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the U.S. Department of Energy.
I then took a shower in the clean water provided by a municipal water utility.
After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC-regulated channels to see what the National Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determined the weather was going to be like, using satellites designed, built, and launched by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration.
I watched this while eating my breakfast of U.S. Department of Agriculture-inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration.
At the appropriate time, as regulated by the U.S. Congress and kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology and the U.S. Naval Observatory, I get into my National Highway Traffic Safety Administration-approved automobile and set out to work on the roads build by the local, state, and federal Departments of Transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the Environmental Protection Agency, using legal tender issued by the Federal Reserve Bank.
On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the U.S. Postal Service and drop the kids off at the public school.
After spending another day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the Department of Labor and the Occupational Safety and Health administration, enjoying another two meals which again do not kill me because of the USDA, I drive my NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to my house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and Fire Marshal's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the local police department.
And then I log on to the internet -- which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration -- and post on Freerepublic.com and Fox News forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right.
Monday, August 10, 2009
A Visit From PZ
There was a Professor from Morris
who gathered the cast and the chorus.
And we all headed down
to visit the clowns
and the bibleists that all abhor us.
As day broke, sunny and grand,
the heathens from all o'er the land
north, east, west and south
all by different routes,
for reason we'd take a firm stand.
To Kentucky we all did flock.
Racing so we'd beat the clock
so if we were inclined
we might head up the line
so we could be the first to mock.
With ticket and button in hand
we followed through with our plan:
for ourselves to see
the insanity
of Ken Ham's folly first hand.
As soon as we walked in the door:
Behold! A large pterasaur!
Graceful and free -
or not. It could be
it evolved to stay off the floor.
The next thing we saw was bizarre -
a grazing and growling brontosaur!
Then we saw what they did
with the raptors and kids.
The Flintstones can't be too far!
The Grand Canyon was, so they say,
carved by the flood in mere days.
If you ignored all the facts,
or hit your head with an axe
or replaced your brain with mayonnaise.
They said if we came we'd believe,
but not after Adam and Eve!
We laughed, not from spite -
we could tell from first sight
that this place was built to deceive
Next was Noah and his Ark.
The departure from fact was stark!
While the rain quickly poured
God put the dinos on board
but didn't have room for the shark.
Heaven forbid if you doubt them
cause no one's more honest than Ken Ham!
He said “You can trust us!”
“We're just lying for jebus!”
and the creo-zombies echo “Amen!”
If there was one part of that twaddle
that kept me from coming unraveled
was the sight of PZ
gloriously
on the dino that was wearing a saddle.
While there we laughed and we learned.
We left wondering how facts could be spurned.
The day went as we thought.
The science was naught.
So we vowed we would never return.
Here is the moral of my tale:
stay away from this shrine to fail!
But if visit you must,
to hide your disgust
go filled up with whiskey and ale.
Edited to fix the spacing.
who gathered the cast and the chorus.
And we all headed down
to visit the clowns
and the bibleists that all abhor us.
As day broke, sunny and grand,
the heathens from all o'er the land
north, east, west and south
all by different routes,
for reason we'd take a firm stand.
To Kentucky we all did flock.
Racing so we'd beat the clock
so if we were inclined
we might head up the line
so we could be the first to mock.
With ticket and button in hand
we followed through with our plan:
for ourselves to see
the insanity
of Ken Ham's folly first hand.
As soon as we walked in the door:
Behold! A large pterasaur!
Graceful and free -
or not. It could be
it evolved to stay off the floor.
The next thing we saw was bizarre -
a grazing and growling brontosaur!
Then we saw what they did
with the raptors and kids.
The Flintstones can't be too far!
The Grand Canyon was, so they say,
carved by the flood in mere days.
If you ignored all the facts,
or hit your head with an axe
or replaced your brain with mayonnaise.
They said if we came we'd believe,
but not after Adam and Eve!
We laughed, not from spite -
we could tell from first sight
that this place was built to deceive
Next was Noah and his Ark.
The departure from fact was stark!
While the rain quickly poured
God put the dinos on board
but didn't have room for the shark.
Heaven forbid if you doubt them
cause no one's more honest than Ken Ham!
He said “You can trust us!”
“We're just lying for jebus!”
and the creo-zombies echo “Amen!”
If there was one part of that twaddle
that kept me from coming unraveled
was the sight of PZ
gloriously
on the dino that was wearing a saddle.
While there we laughed and we learned.
We left wondering how facts could be spurned.
The day went as we thought.
The science was naught.
So we vowed we would never return.
Here is the moral of my tale:
stay away from this shrine to fail!
But if visit you must,
to hide your disgust
go filled up with whiskey and ale.
Edited to fix the spacing.
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